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Post Info TOPIC: Best way to build your self confidence?
Do you feel confident about yourself? [162 vote(s)]

most times
17.3%
all the time
4.9%
never
21.0%
I'm only human here! It depends on the weather
56.8%


Honoured Mook

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Best way to build your self confidence?


How would you walk out every day feeling like you can take on the world, do anything and look and act like a diva doing it?

-- Edited by apple juliet sherry at 07:31, 2008-05-04

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MookyDuchess

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Confidence is great, if you can fake it, you'll start to feel it and eventually, you won't know if you're faking confidence or really are confident or just not making sense on an internet forum any more.

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Seasoned Mookster

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i wish i had confidence if someone says something nice i feel confident but someone else will say or do something that makes me feel horrible and then i feel even worse than i did before...i used to not care what people think i dont whats happend to me :S:S:S i shall try faking it...(confidence that is)

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High Mookish Shaman

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Kitty Fire wrote:

Confidence is great, if you can fake it, you'll start to feel it and eventually, you won't know if you're faking confidence or really are confident or just not making sense on an internet forum any more.


         XD



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Honoured Mook

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Kitty Fire wrote:

Confidence is great, if you can fake it, you'll start to feel it and eventually, you won't know if you're faking confidence or really are confident or just not making sense on an internet forum any more.






Lol Kitty.

In my experience it only takes a small amount of confidence to fake a lot of confidence, and once you can fake it, you start to get it. That's how I got my job biggrin.gif Then you save your small panic attack moments for when you're in the car and have gotten lost on the way to the job interview........

..............................Or maybe that's just me. XD

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Honoured Mook

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the way I see it is that you don't have to agree with what anyone says about you
also a great comeback line is, "yeah, so?"
and "It takes on to know one"
i'm just working on boosting my self esteem and I know this is the way to go about it. try to feel good about you by not thinking so much on everything that you don't like
I know, easier said than done, but try making yourself laugh, reading an uplifting book or taking a hot bath and if the bathroom is crowded with people who just won't get out, which is usually my case, go take a w alk and examine nature. it really helps.

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Honoured Mook

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thanks guys. I am almost complete as a person thanks to mookychick! soon I shall be rebuilt!

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MookyDuchess

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Not thinking so much about what you don't like about yourself, just gets you thinking about what you don't like. (Brains aren't very good at spotting words like 'not'...)

Try thinking about the things you do like about yourself..

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Honoured Mook

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yeah good point. I remeber when I used to do that. oh the pain ashamed.gif

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Seasoned Mookster

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ok good idea!...i like my ears

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MookyDuchess

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Excellent, you have good ears. Is that because they look nice, or you have good hearing?


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Seasoned Mookster

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thank you! definately not the hearing as im completely deaf in my right ear haha! yea i think they look nice! i have awesome ears!

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Seasoned Mookster

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so what does everyone else like about themselves?

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Honoured Mook

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I just think that I have a long way to go but the journey will be worth it as long as I come out on top in the end.

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Seasoned Mookster

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you will dont worry people always knock my confidence but i think if u find one thing - whether it be bog or small - about yourself you can work on it. and i think if you see people you want to be or you think are better than you, you know they have insecuritys too but if you focus on what you like about yourself ull shine above them all... im basically repeating what kitty fire said before but its true! good luck! if you really cant find anything you like then ask an honest frend :)

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Honoured Mook

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I don't really have a part of my body that I especially like...but I'm damn proud of my mind ;D


I know it sounds weird, but if you're having one of those weird body days (you know, you're convinced you've got scales and shiz) I tend to go out and people watch...then you realise that everyone else does have a tummy / bum / no boobs. Then you have to think why they don't look worried about it, and project that onto yourself. Works. Honest.

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Seasoned Mookster

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safe! i think being proud of your mind is amazing and so important, helps with those social situations where you dont know what to say or you dont understand what there talking bout. and its far more important than looks because you need it all the time!

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MookyDuchess

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My mind's a good 'un too. Though it sometimes drifts too much. But it's still sharp, clever and retains interesting facts that I need.

I can draw quite well too. That's good.

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Seasoned Mookster

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o yea your an awesome drawer thats such a buff skill to have!

my mind drifts too im very forgetful...

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MookyDuchess

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Thank you.

(I'm also polite and civil. :) )

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Honoured Mook

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Kitty Fire wrote:

Confidence is great, if you can fake it, you'll start to feel it and eventually, you won't know if you're faking confidence or really are confident or just not making sense on an internet forum any more.






I agree with Kitty Fire. Fake it till you make it. If you're in a situation where you don't know many people, just start saying 'Hi' and introducing yourself. It's usually that easy.

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MookyDuchess

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And yet, I've got some art work currently 'out there', which is possibly going to lead to something more time consuming (but no money... Grrr...) and suddenly, I have no confidence in any of it.

I hate every piece I'm putting on show, I find it difficult to truly accept the positive things people are saying about it, believing them to be joking in some way, on somewhat insincere. And some people I've decided are very talented are saying some good things about my artwork. So I should be pleased, yet I'm paranoid.

But I know, really, know, that I'm deserving of the praise. I know I'm good, it's just I've never really accepted, totally accepted, that I'm good at drawing. (I mean, I've only just about got round to accepting that I'm passable at constructing sentences and writing stuff that people might want to read, and I've been writing for this site for two years.)

So, yeah, fake it 'til you make it.

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MookyDuchess

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Oh, and should a publisher send you a letter rejecting your artwork, look at the positive comments in the letter, rather than the one sentence that politely says no thank you. :)

Spent all day trying to do that...

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Honoured Mook

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Two big ways I found to improve confidence/self esteem etc... actually 3.

1 - only hang out with people who feel confident, have a good image, are good to you, and it will rub off, whether you like it or not. Hang out with those who knock you, knock each other and are generally down in ther dumps, and that will rub off too - your choice.

2 - pick something you are not very good at (or don;t think so any how) and think would be useful. Then go out and practice, learn how to do it etc. The feeling of achievement is something you will never forget and proves you can do anything you put your mind to. I rememeber when I had my own business I thought I was lousy at sales, so I put a manager in my business and went out and got a commisison only sales job for 6 months, learnt the hard way.

3 - although there are hundreds of self esteem/positive thinking books out there, some of them are really good. It may sound like brainwashing or a cult, but those ra ra ra type of meetings are a reall buzz and if you can disassoicate yourself from the 'wierder' aspects of it, and continue to think for yourself, then they are wonderful. I actually became an Amway distributor for a couple of years and attended loads of meeting, listened to loads of tapes etc, and although I never put in the work to succeed with Amway, I learnt just about all the personal skills I have today, and without that time I would never have reached the point of a happy, adjusted family life.

But then, these are jsut the things that have worked for me. The reality is everyone is different and so you need to find what works for you.


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High Mookish Shaman

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I woke up one day and decided that I didnt give a crap about what anyone else thought of me. And now I love stuff! :)

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Honoured Mook

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Oh, the revelation must be sweet!

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Honoured Mook

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red spirit moon wrote:

I woke up one day and decided that I didnt give a crap about what anyone else thought of me. And now I love stuff! :)






I like that one too!

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High Mookish Shaman

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Yeah its great. It makes you feel so happy!
yaaaaaaay! :)

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Regular Crew

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I think the best way to become more self confident is to break the rules, and I don't mean take drugs etc.

I always used to be a very shy person, I would never collect awards or anything I got at school or anything. But last year my friends and I did a thing at school for business and I decided to buy and wear a rabbit suit for two days. Th one thing that gave me the confidence to do it was that the suit had a face and people wouldn't know it was me. So I did it. And it was so funny, people still talk about it. But something just sort of clicked inside and I started doing more bold stuff. Now I'm more confident in my abilities, the way I look, everything!

Sorry for such a long post, but my message is: do something crazy! Even if people don't know it's you doing it, it'll make you feel great!

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MookyDuchess

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Hello Babbit and welcome to the forum.

Yes, a lot of our fears are bound up in the whole, what will people think of me. Then, when given the chance to do something anonymously, even to the extreme of dressing as a giant bunny, you find you can do so much more. And well done you for carrying that on even further.

Which leads my fractured mind onto the path that we put so much store worrying about what other people think of us, we forget that everyone else is doing the same. All of us, worried about the impression we give. So, some get all shy and defensive and hide, some get all boisterous and offensive. But they still worry that people will think little of them.


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